Every time you come to this page I want you to hear me say “thank you” for the way you serve the engaged couples in our church. The value of a mature, mentor couple to invest in the life of an engaged and newly couple cannot be overestimated. With the material below we want to make your mentoring experience as logistically easy as possible. For each structured meeting with your engaged couple you will find the following information:
- The video we created to orient engaged couples to each meeting
- The most up-to-date tools / evaluations for each meeting
- A sample exercise for the “Sketching Your Marriage Story” assignment
- Templates of the form e-mails for you to cut-and-paste
- Links to all the FAQ’s posts for/from mentors (at the bottom of the page).
First Meeting: Getting to Know Each Other
One week before this first meeting, please send your couple a personalized version of this e-mail (01. Meeting One E-mail) to make sure they have everything they need.
- Resource One: Sketching Our Marriage Story
- Resource One (Sample): Marriage Story_Birth to Wedding_SAMPLE
- Resource Two: Celebrating Our Non-Moral Differences
- Resource Three: Purity Covenant (4 minute discussion of this covenant here)
***Note: For the first meeting you will also need to complete these three evaluations. You will review them with your mentors at the end of this meeting to identify your main subject for meeting two.
- Evaluation One:
- Marital Expectations (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Marriage Expectations (printable PDF version) – GCM_Foundations_Eval1_Expectations
- Evaluation Two:
- Marriage as Covenant (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Marriage as Covenant (printable PDF version) – GCM_Foundations_Eval2_Covenant
- Evaluation Three:
- Character & Role Expectations (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Character & Role Expectations (printable PDF version) – GCM_Foundations_Eval3_Character&Roles
Second Meeting: Foundations
One week before this second meeting, please send your couple a personalized version of this e-mail (02. Meeting Two E-mail) to make sure they have everything they need.
- Evaluation One:
- Listening (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Listening (printable PDF version) – GCMevaluation_Listening
- Evaluation Two:
- Day-to-Day Communication (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Day-to-Day Communication (printable PDF version) – GCMevaluation_Day-to-Day_Communication
- Evaluation Three:
- Conflict Resolution (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Conflict Resolution (printable PDF version) – GCMevaluation_Conflict Resolution
Third Meeting: Communication
One week before this third meeting, please send your couple a personalized version of this e-mail (03. Meeting Three E-mail) to make sure they have everything they need.
-
Evaluation One:
- Financial Beliefs and Character (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Financial Beliefs and Character (printable PDF version) – Evaluation – Financial Beliefs and Character
- Evaluation Two:
- The Budgeting Process (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- The Budgeting Process (printable PDF version) – Evaluation – Budgeting Process
- Evaluation Three:
- Attitude Toward Debt and Savings (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Attitude Toward Debt and Savings (printable PDF version) – Evaluation – Debt and Savings
Fourth Meeting: Finances
One week before this fourth meeting, please send your couple a personalized version of this e-mail (04. Meeting Four E-mail) to make sure they have everything they need.
-
Evaluation One:
- Personal Decision Making (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Personal Decision Making (printable PDF version) – GCMevaluation_Personal Decision Making
- Evaluation Two:
- Consensus Decision Making (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Consensus Decision Making (printable PDF version) – GCMevaluation_Consensus Decision Making
- Evaluation Three
- Headship-Submission Decision Making (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Headship-Submission Decision Making (printable PDF version) – GCMevaluation_Corporate Decision Making
Fifth Meeting: Decision Making
One week before this fifth meeting, please send your couple a personalized version of this e-mail (05. Meeting Five E-mail) to make sure they have everything they need.
- Evaluation One:
- Preferences in Expressing / Receiving Love (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Preferences in Expressing / Receiving Love (printable PDF version) – GCM_Intimacy_Eval_Differences
- Evaluation Two:
- Living in the Larger Love Story (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Living in the Larger Love Story (printable PDF version) – GCM_Intimacy_Eval_The Story
- Evaluation Three:
- Being Excellent Lovers (automated scoring on-line version // preferred)
- Being Excellent Lovers (printable PDF version) – GCM_Intimacy_Eval_Sex
Sixth Meeting: Intimacy
One week before this sixth meeting, please send your couple a personalized version of this e-mail (06. Meeting Six E-mail) to make sure they have everything they need. After this meeting you may schedule the recommended 6 week, 3 month, and 6 month post-marital meetings with your couple.
FAQ Database
In this section we will link you to brief responses to many of the frequently asked questions asked by/of marriage mentors. This is a growing list of questions and answers, so please check back each time you get information to meet with your couples to see what’s been added.
- What if the couple comes into the program late (close to their wedding)?
- What if we think they need to meet with a more experienced counselor? What if we think they do not need to get married… at least not in the time frame they’ve set?
- What if we’re uncomfortable talking about [blank] or don’t feel like we do a good job with [blank]?
- What should we know about pre-marital couples (just in case we forgot what this season of life was like)?
- Are there articles or books I need to be reading?
- What if we learn the couple is living together?
Trackbacks/Pingbacks