This is the fifth video in a nine part series entitled “False Love: Overcoming Sexual Sin from Pornography to Adultery.” False Love has a complementing seminar entitled “True Betrayal: Overcoming the Betrayal of Your Spouse’s Sexual Sin.” For more information on either seminar, please follow the links provided.
False Love: Step 5 from Equip on Vimeo.
The follow quotes are part of the teaching notes being referenced.
STEP 5
CONFESS TO THOSE AFFECTED for harm done and seek to make amends.
“Making oneself transparent to another person is one of the difficult things that must be done. A man may institute all of the other steps outlined in this book into his life, but if he hedges on this one, all other efforts might prove to have been in vain (p. 63).” Steve Gallagher in At the Altar of Sexual Idolatry
“I hadn’t asked her before bringing this sin into our home. If she was going to live with the consequences of it, then she had the right to determine what she needed to know. If we had any chance of rebuilding this marriage, there was no more room for lies or half-truths. In our groups, we answer more questions related to talking during adultery recovery than any other subject. We might have thought trust or forgiveness or even sex would come up most often, but, in reality, conversation is the bridge that can deliver trust, forgiveness, and sex (p. 148).” Gary & Mona Shriver in Unfaithful
“Confession includes two important aspects: (1) Confession brings secrets to the light of day so we drain them of their power… (2) Confession allows God and a caring person to see our ugliness and still love us… It is usually not healthy to make our wives our only accountability partners or our primary confessors (p. 339).” Doug Rosenau in A Celebration of Sex
“I have heard people tell me many times that they do not have anyone to confess to. What they were really saying is that they were not desperate enough to seek out someone that might be able to assist them (p. 75-76).” Steve Gallagher in At the Altar of Sexual Idolatry
“Building real relationships of love with real people is crucial to the transformation of your imagination. You have spent way too much time in your private fantasy world. A world of honest, constructive relationships await (p. 24)… The Bible is full of stories about sexual sin, and they are told in a way that leaves us without illusions, but is never arousing or morbid (p. 27).” David Powlison in Sexual Addiction
Confession Tool from Step 5: Confession Guide for Sexual Sin