Council of Counselors: Traumatic Relationships / Postpartum Depression / Attraction vs. Objectification / Anger & Calvary / Sleep Deprivation

This is a weekly post that highlights resources from other counselors that I have found helpful. The counselors may be from the biblical counseling, Christian psychology, integration, or secular counseling traditions. By linking to a post, I am not giving it my full endorsement, I am merely indicating that I believe it made a unique contribution or raised an important subject for consideration.

Counseling Complex Traumatic Relationships by Rachael Rosser

Complex Post Traumatic Stress (C-PTS) is a condition that results from chronic or long-term exposure to emotional trauma over which a victim has little or no control and from which there is little or no hope of escape. Such cases can result from verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse and neglect or trafficking. The word trauma comes from the Greek language and means to wound. Trauma disrupts one’s ability to live life abundantly (John 10:10). Complex trauma occurs repeatedly, cumulatively, and can even increase over time. In a family context, an example of complex trauma is ongoing (physical or sexual) violence against family members. The trauma is interpersonal and is marked by deception and betrayal. This also may be called accumulative, developmental, current, or chronic trauma where trauma may be experienced as a child and then again as an adult in a different relationship or a wartime situation.

• If you benefited from this article, you may also want to read “5 Ways to Establish an Environment of Safety in Which to Address PTSD.”

Postpartum Depression and the Christian by Kathryn Butler

The symptoms of PPD mirror those of depression during other times in life (e.g., saddened mood, loss of pleasure from activities we love, thoughts of worthlessness and guilt, difficulty concentrating). Often after having a baby, however, we mistake signs of depression for normal stressors of motherhood. In particular, sleep disturbances, fatigue, and weight changes—all features of clinical depression—may also represent typical postpartum challenges.

• If you want help identifying the symptoms of depression, consider this resource “Depression-Anxiety Daily Symptom Chart.”

Are You Attracted to Your Wife or Objectifying Her? by Noah Filipiak

You can be sexually attracted to someone without lusting over them. You lust when you take your natural sexual attraction to the next level of consciously entertaining and holding onto that thought. Savoring it or playing it over and over again in your mind. Picturing yourself with that person sexually. This is different than noticing someone as being attractive.

• If you found this article helpful, you may also want to read “19 Possible Motive-Triggers for Pornography.”

What Difference Does it Make for Your Anger that Jesus Died on the Cross? by Nathan Millican

Personally, I believe that’s a question a believer should regularly ask concerning any sin in their life? What differences does Jesus’ death make with regards to my lust, bitterness, lying, pride, and others sin? The answer to that question is crucial to making no provision for the flesh (Romans 13:14) and walking in holiness (1 Peter 1:16).

• An excellent follow up to this article would be “What Is Righteous Anger?“

Why You Can’t Think Straight When You’re Sleep Deprived by Michael Breus

After a bad night of sleep, we all typically feel distracted and off our mental game. But do you really know all the ways a lack of sleep interferes with your cognitive performance? Most of my patients are surprised to learn just how broadly it affects their ability to think at their best.

• For more on the important of sleep, see the meaningful meme below.

What I’m Reading

Preparing Your Heart for Marriage: Devotions for Engaged Couples by Gary Thomas.The wedding is planned, but are you spiritually prepared for your wedding day? Trusted relationship author Gary Thomas coaches engaged couples on how to grow closer to the Lord in the days leading up to the wedding as a means of preparing them for all the days after the wedding.

Engagement is bursting with promise, hope, joy, and anticipation of all kinds. It can also be one of the busiest times your life. For some, planning a wedding, with all the decisions involved, can feel less like the onset of marriage and more like a long to-do list. Amidst the busyness, this devotional is designed to help you think through the spiritual priorities and challenges that lie ahead in order to grow an outstanding marriage filled with love, grace, and God’s blessing.This lovely book provides encouraging entries that will help you deal with common issues such as:

Tweets of the Week

Meaningful Meme

On the Lighter Side

Because, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones,” Proverbs 17:22.

Funny… and a little personal.