Council of Counselors: Pastors Avoiding Counseling / Marriage & Chronic Illness / Sexuality & Identity / Kissing Dating Good-Bye / Mentioning Suicide

This is a weekly post that highlights resources from other counselors that I have found helpful. The counselors may be from the biblical counseling, Christian psychology, integration, or secular counseling traditions. By linking to a post, I am not giving it my full endorsement, I am merely indicating that I believe it made a unique contribution or raised an important subject for consideration.

Seven Reasons Why Many Pastors Avoid a Counseling Ministry by Thom Rainer

I recently conducted an unscientific but revealing social media poll. I asked pastors to share with me what aspects of pastoral ministry they enjoyed the most. Counseling was listed last, at least indicating it was their least favorite aspect of ministry. So, I went back to these pastors and asked a follow-up question. I wanted to know why so many pastors were avoiding counseling ministries today. Their responses were clear and consistent…

• If you enjoyed this post, you might like my series on “10 Reasons Your Church Might Not Want a Formal Counseling Ministry” (Part One) (Part Two) which looks at the challenges and opportunities that come with a formal counseling ministry.

I Found Hope in My Husband’s Chronic Illness by Rachel Gilson

My husband Andrew’s foot ailments have given me a curious window into the Christian life. Before he and I were dating, his first swelling incident was misdiagnosed by a college nurse, and we only discovered the mistake when it happened again five years later. Both seemed like freak incidents. Then in 2012, on a summer mission trip in the Middle East, his left foot swelled up and left him on the couch for the remainder of the trip. Much of his life since has been progressively couch-bound.

• If you were challenged by this article, you might also benefit from my article on Psalm 102 as an example of how the gospel speaks to suffering.

You Are Not Your Sexuality by Sam Allberry

This talk is one attempt to outline some of the key lessons for the whole church that those of us with same-sex attraction are learning. Here are five: (1) Your identity is in Christ, (2) Discipleship is hard, (3) God’s Word is good, (4) The church is vital, and (5) The future is glorious.

• If your church wants to grow in how it cares for those who experience unwanted same sex attraction, consider this resource: SJI Forum & Panel: Do Ask, Do Tell, Let’s Talk.

A Statement on I Kissed Dating Goodbye by Joshua Harris

Two years ago I began a process of re-evaluating the book. This included inviting people to share their stories with me on my website, personal phone calls with readers, an in-depth study of issues surrounding my book overseen by one of my graduate school professors, and finally, creating a documentary film that captured the conversations with people who were reshaping my thinking.

• Whatever your assessment of Joshua’s book, I greatly appreciate his model of listening and healthy confession – 7 Marks of a Good Apology vs. 8 Marks of a Bad Apology

What Happens When You Mention Suicide in Therapy? by Seth Gillihan

The severity of the risk will determine the course of action. A high level of danger for the person might require hospitalization to ensure their safety. When the clinician concludes that there is no emergency, they will likely develop a safety plan (Stanley & Brown, 2012) with their patient. The plan will include ways for the person to manage suicidal thoughts and impulses, arranged as a series of steps…

• If you are struggling with despair, consider this resource Overcoming Depression-Anxiety: A Suffering Paradigm.

What I’m Reading

Addictive Habits: Changing for Good (31-Day Devotionals for Life) by David Dunham. It begins with a choice . . . but soon that choice overpowers and traps you. You both love and hate your habit, and it begins to define you. Addiction is a blend of choice and enslavement—but change is possible through God and his Word. These daily devotionals remind us of God’s truth and help us apply it to our lives, addressing our responsibility for addiction, our relationship with the God who can free us, and techniques for first restructuring our lives and then remaining faithful long-term.

In the 31-Day Devotionals for Life series, biblical counselors and Bible teachers guide you through Scripture passages that speak to specific situations or struggles, helping you to apply God’s Word to your life in practical ways day after day.

Tweets of the Week

Meaningful Meme

On the Lighter Side

Because, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones,” Proverbs 17:22.

You have to scroll through the whole thread.