This is a weekly post that highlights resources from other counselors that I have found helpful. The counselors may be from the biblical counseling, Christian psychology, integration, or secular counseling traditions. By linking to a post, I am not giving it my full endorsement, I am merely indicating that I believe it made a unique contribution or raised an important subject for consideration.
But does turning the other cheek and denying ourselves really mean we should endure unhealthy relationships and circumstances, no matter what? Should we stick around in relationships we sense are damaging us because we need to “deny ourselves”? Here are four observations that might help as we consider such questions.
- If you want to read another article on a passage that is often misapplied in an abuse consider, consider my post Why We Should Always Teach Romans 13 with Romans 12.
How to Avoid a Life of Regrets by Jeremy Pierre
So here is a working definition of regret as it applies to people: Regret is grieving what should have been and our failure to bring it about. That means regret involves both a preference for how the past should have been different and a disapproval of ourselves for not making it happen. Let’s unpack these features a bit.
- If you are already living in regret, consider my podcast Dealing with Regret.
Why Cry? 3 Biblical Reasons for Tears! by Lucy Ann Moll
In this short article, learn three biblical reasons for tears: (1) tears expression honest emotion, (2) God commands you to cry at certain times, and (3) crying is good for you.
- For another article on the benefits of unpleasant emotions or experiences, consider my post Biblical Whining.
A High Calling: What I’ve Learned from Pastoring Addicts by David Dunham
When I entered into Seminary I had plans for my ministry career. I was going to preach lots of exciting sermons and pastor a growing church. Admittedly they weren’t very detailed and they were simplistic and naive, but nowhere in my mind was the idea of working largely with addicted individuals. Over the last ten years, however, God has given me increasing opportunity to work directly with those who are struggling with some kind of life-dominating addiction. As much as I believe God has used me to be helpful, working with addicts has also taught me much. In working with addicts I have learned nuances about the power of confession, the significance of community, and healing of the gospel.
- If you want to experience more of what Pastor Dunham describes, then consider my podcast series Overcoming Addiction.
10 Reasons Why Today’s Teenagers Are So Anxious by Amy Morin
Some young people are overachieving perfectionists with a crippling fear of failure. Others worry so much about what their peers think of them that they’re unable to function. Some have endured rough circumstances throughout their young lives. But others have stable families, supportive parents, and plenty of resources. I suspect the rise in anxiety reflects several societal changes and cultural shifts we’ve seen over the past couple of decades. Here are the top 10 reasons:
- Regardless of the source of our anxieties, once of the things we must do is Learning to Doubt Our Fears
What I’m Reading
Suffering and the Heart of God: How Trauma Destroys and Christ Restores by Diane Langberg.Do Trauma and Abuse Have the Last Word?When someone suffers through trauma, can healing happen? And, if yes, how does it happen? Dr. Diane Langberg tackles these complex and difficult questions with the insights she has gained through more than forty years of counseling those whose lives have been destroyed by trauma and abuse. Her answer carefully explained in Suffering and the Heart of God is Yes, what trauma destroys, Christ can and does restore.
But it s not a fast process, instead much patience is required from family, friends, and counselors as they wisely and respectfully help victims unpack their traumatic suffering through talking, tears, and time. And it s not a process that can be separated from the work of God in both a counselor and counselee. Dr. Langberg calls all of those who wish to help sufferers to model Jesus s sacrificial love and care in how they listen, love, and guide. The heart of God is revealed to sufferers as they grow to understand the cross of Christ and how their God came to this earth and experienced such severe suffering that he too is well-acquainted with grief. The cross of Christ is the lens that transforms and redeems traumatic suffering and its aftermath, not only for the sufferer, but it also transforms those who walk with the suffering. This book will be a great help to anyone who loves, listens to, and seeks to help someone impacted by trauma and abuse. There is no quick fix, but there is the hope for healing through the love of God in Christ.
Tweets of the Week
The destructive power of comparing ourselves to others: We promote "sameness" when God has created uniqueness.
— Jeremy Linneman (@jslinneman) January 23, 2018
"When you are an unbeliever, the Law points to your need for grace. When you are a believer, grace points to your need for the Law." @jenniferwilkin
— J.D. Greear (@jdgreear) January 25, 2018
Attempting to do conflict resolution through text messaging is like attempting to call for an ambulance through postal mail. The medium matters.
— challies (@challies) January 26, 2018
On the Lighter Side
Because, “A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones,” Proverbs 17:22.