How many of us have had a great sex education?
- That talk with your parents, did it tell you everything you needed to know? I’m pretty sure it would have been traumatic had they answered all the questions you have now back then.
- Your friends in the middle and high school locker room, I’m sure they knew what they were talking about? We all look back on that season of life and reflect on the wisdom we had, right?
- What you’ve learned on the internet (except for this post… of course), I’m sure was wholesome and beneficial… or even realistic for that matter? Oddly, no one watches a James Bond movie and thinks they can escape an exploding building in the nick of time, but people do watch a romantic comedy or pornographic movie and think “my life should be like that” … with a choreographed sound track.
- Trial and error, do you really want to entrust this aspect of your marriage to chance and instincts? Yes, we should and will learn about sex over a lifetime of marriage, but if most couples had a better understanding of how the arousal system and bonding nature of sex worked together they could see their sex life grow stronger with each encounter.
Let’s face it, the church (and most Christian families) have largely abdicated sex education to our culture and our culture has been happy to fill the void of the church’s silence. This silence and the resulting curiosity about what we don’t know are leading factors in what makes books like 50 Shades of Grey popular even amongst Christians who would morally disagree with its content.
The fact that God created sex as a good gift does not tell us how to have good sex. The truth that we’re supposed to wait until marriage to have sex does not equip us to selflessly and skillfully cultivate the pleasure of our spouse in a way that leaves us mutually satisfied while strengthening the bond of trust.
At the Summit, we do not want to contribute to the church’s silence.
We will be addressing the subject of sexuality at the upcoming Sam James Institute Forum. In the second half of this presentation, I will be presenting “Learning to Skillfully and Unashamedly Enjoy God’s Gift of Sex.”
While the primary audience of this material will be for married or engaged couples, we believe that — in a culture that is already sex-saturated — having a wholesome view of what God intends sex to be in marriage can be an important asset in strengthening single’s resolve not to settle for something less outside the context of marriage.
LIVING IN 50 SHADES OF GREY
A Cultural Assessment and Christian Education in Sexuality
Sam James Institute Forum
Date: Tuesday February 10, 2015
Time: 6:30 to 7:30 pm – Cindy Peterson, Director of Women’s Discipleship at Summit
Time: 7:30 to 8:30 pm – Brad Hambrick, Pastor of Counseling at Summit
Location: The Summit Church, Brier Creek South Venue
Address: 2415-107 Presidential Drive; Durham, NC 27703
If you are unable to attend this event, but are interested in this material, then a version of this presentation is available in videos 4 and 5 of the Creating Gospel-Centered Marriage: Intimacy seminar.